Ia€™m on an ego trip, so come along for the ride,
And you will find out that ita€™s all completely justified,
Or you could run and hide, thata€™d be okay with me,
Long as you know what put a€?the greata€™ inside a€?the great Luke Ski!a€™
*the great*a€¦ *Luke*a€¦ *Ski!*
*the great*a€¦ *Luke*a€¦ *Ski!*
*Musical comedy! The most glorious words in the English language!*
Verse 2:
You wona€™t believe all that I gotta go through,
Just so I can get here and do a show for you.
Schmoozing the con staff to book the invite,
The next stepa€™s plugging it on my website.
Youa€™ll get so many e-mails ita€™ll make ya wretch,
Ia€™m slingina€™ more Spam than a Monty Python sketch.
Pack every prop and costume Ia€™m able,
CDs and signage for the merch table.
Then I cruise as I hop behind the wheel
Of my a€?97 Dodge Neon Luke-Ski-Mobile!
Two hundred K miles, and Ia€™m addina€™ more,
Get to the convention, kick down the door,
Check in, get my badge, next part of the scheme
Is for me to transform into a one man street team!
Put up fliers everywhere the eye can see,
So everybody knows where my concert will be.
If I dona€™t promote myself, who the Hell will?
You? I dona€™t think so. I got no time to chill.
Sit on panels, (FireFly versus Star Trek,)
Pluggina€™ my show, all the way until sound check.
Then my adrenaline forms a geek rage,
The crowd goes wild as Luke Ski hits the stage!
Finally I get to rock the mike,
And kick these fandom lyrics you all like,
And if you like my comedy skills,
Youa€™ll buy a disc so I can pay my rent and bills.
Thata€™s my thing, I aina€™t got no bling,
Just a few choice fangirls, and a mike in which to sing.
Those who decry me for living my dreams,
Theya€™re just jealous at their day jobs eatina€™ Krispy Kremes.
You may think this themea€™sa little harsh on thee,
Well thata€™s too bad cause ita€™s the truth about the great Luke Ski
*the great*a€¦ *Luke*a€¦ *Ski!*
*the great*a€¦ *Luke*a€¦ *Ski!*
*the great*a€¦ *Luke*a€¦ *Ski!*
*the great*a€¦ *Luke, youa€™re a genius!*
Verse 3:
You must be a jerk if you say that youa€™re proud,
Of all youa€™ve accomplished, ita€™s just not allowed.
Milestones ita€™s taken me years to achieve,
I celebrate, cause in me I believe.
Ia€™ll say Ia€™m great and ignore and their wack ilk.
Aina€™t gonna steal any more of my self-esteem.
And Ia€™ll win the Pegasus for best rap filk,
(Yeah?) In the year Twenty-seven-thirteen.
This is Dementia: The Next Generation,
And Ia€™m the Jean-Luke of the Federation.
Ita€™s revolution time! Are you ready? (Yeah!)
Ia€™m the a€?GR-8a€™, to the a€?Lukea€™, to the a€?SKEa€™.
Oops, I meant to say a€?Ia€™a€¦
Uhh, a€?cause a€?SKIa€™ spells a€?Skia€™. I no longer have to justify,
The things I do or what I say,
And if I never make it big, thata€™ll be okay,
But if the time does come, watch my stardom rise,
Ia€™m exhalted in the worshipping nationsa€™ eyes,
And Ia€™ve gone ego mad, from all my fortune and fame,
Ia€™ll grab the mic and scream, (a€?WHATa€™S MY NAME?!?!a€ ) (And youa€™ll say,)
*the great*a€¦ *Luke*a€¦ *Ski!*
*the great*a€¦ *Luke*a€¦ *Ski!*
*the great*a€¦ *Luke, it is your destiny.*
That prophecy you wrote? Well hey it just came true!
Right now my default voice is mine, and ita€™s sayina€™ a€?Screw you!a€
To all the haters, rue! Ia€™ve hit my destiny!
And now you know what put a€?the greata€™ inside *the great*a€¦ *Luke*a€¦ *Ski!*
(Spoken:)
YES! IT IS I! THE GREAT LUKE SKI! THE OUTCAST MUSICAL JESTER OF SCI-FI! EMISSARY OF RAP DEMENTIA! AND THE FUNNIEST MOTHER-FILKER OF ALL TIME!a€¦ (music stops, the word a€?TIME!a€ echoes a few timesa€¦)
a€¦*Once again, Ia€™ve alienated our target demographic.*
1 | It's A Fanboy Christmas II: The Wrath Of Claus |
2 | It's A Fanboy Christmas |