A pity she does not exist
A shame he's not a fag
The only girl I ever loved
Was Andrew in drag
There is no hope of love for me
From here on I go stag
The only girl I'll ever love
Is Andrew in drag
Andrew in drag
Andrew in drag
Andrew in drag, yeah
I don't know why I even went
It's really not my bag
Just thought it might be funny
To see Andrew in drag
The moment he walked on the stage
My tail began to wag
Wag like a little weiner dog
For Andrew in drag
Andrew in drag
Andrew in drag
Andrew in drag, yeah
I've always been a ladies' man
And I don't have to brag
But I've become a mama's boy
For Andrew in drag
I'd sign away my trust fund
I would even sell the Jag
If I could spend my misspent youth
With Andrew in drag
Andrew in drag
Andrew in drag
Andrew in drag, yeah
So stick him a dress
And he's the only boy I'd shag
The only boy I'd anything
Is Andrew in drag
I'll never see that girl again
He did it as a gag
I'll pine away forevermore
For Andrew in drag